Police have stuck a fork in this dairy deviant. The so-called “Swiss Cheese Pervert” was nabbed by Philadelphia police at his home in Norristown, capping an extensive hunt for the cheese creep who exposed himself while wielding the food item, according to reports.
Christopher Pagano, 41, was unceremoniously led out of his home on Noble St. by police with their guns drawn Thursday afternoon. Pagano faces a slew of charges including stalking, indecent exposure and harassment, according to Philadelphia police.
“Police identified Christopher Pagano through their intense investigation efforts and interviews conducted with victims by SVU investigators,” police spokeswoman Christine O’Brien said in a statement. The portly pervert posted bail Friday morning and is back on the street, NBC Philadelphia reported.
“He was always a little off,” family friend Dorothy Kendall, 79, told the Daily News. “Christopher was always kind of strange. I don’t think he was real smart.”
Pagano’s struggles to stay in shape may have transferred to his now-infamous food fetish, Kendall mused. “He had a problem overeating. He was always overweight,” she said. “Using a piece of cheese? I just can’t imagine that.”
A reporter from Philadelphia magazine asked Pagano last Saturday — several days before his arrest — whether or not he was the abnormal assailant. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” a shirtless Pagano told PhillyMag. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Sometimes people confuse me with somebody else.”
Pagano’s neighbors told NBC Philadelphia that the pasteurized perv walked around half-naked and occassionally carried a gun. “He was a weirdo,” neighbor Rae Dean told the station. “He used to come outside in his underwear with no shirt.”
Pagano was busted in 2006 and 2009 for soliciting a prostitute, but both times the charges were dropped. Local detectives told PhillyMag they recalled the man prodding prostitutes to perform sex acts involving cheese.
“And I believe cheese was on the menu, but I’m not completely sure. If my memory serves me, it was Swiss.” Norristown Police detective James Angelucci, who worked both cases told the publication. Norristown police did not immediately return requests for comment on Friday morning.
Pagano terrorized women in the Mayfair section of Philadelphia, propositioning women to rub the cheese on his crotch. Several women came forward to recount their curdling encounter with Pagano, who was cruising around the neighborhood in a car looking for victims.
The local neighborhood watch posted a damning photo of the overweight man holding up the slice of Swiss last week. “We are glad that we were able to assist the Philadelphia Police Department in taking a sexual predator off the streets of Philadelphia,” the Mayfair Town Watch wrote on its Facebook page.
One woman, only identified as Priscilla, told NBC Philadelphia that the creep pulled up in a car next to her and flashed the dairy product. She quickly drove away horrified when she realized he had exposed himself.
Naturally, a spoof Twitter account, @Swisscheeseperv, quickly popped up to poke fun at Pagano’s fondue fetish. Pagano could not immediately be reached for comment.